2 posts tagged “anniversary”

Yesterday, this little marriage I'm in turned two years old.

Awwwww!

It's true! It's starting to walk and grow teeth and everything. Bless!

To celebrate this most glorious occasion, Iain and I went ice skating at Hampton Court Palace. (With approximately 454 other families.)

We've never really been a cheesy, "do what yer 'sposed-ta" couple, so sleeping in, grabbing a Starbucks and then driving over to a palace to do an hour of ice skating was the perfect day for us.

This was taken right before an Ice Marshal came over and told us to put our phones and cameras away. OooOoOo! Scary ICE MARSHAL! Your authority frightens me!

I actually surprised myself at how well I skated, considering I have not thrown myself on the ice whilst wearing tiny blades for about a decade. I wasn't doing triple sow cows or anything, but I didn't fall. Not once.

Iain did alright. He maaaaay have been wizzing in and out of families and adults and, you know, not falling and generally going faster than anyone else on the rink - but let's focus on the fact that I didn't fall and that I looked nice.

Seeing as the Ice Marshal completely scared us with his authoritative manner of skating, and - you know - marshalling the ice, we couldn't take any photos of us TOGETHER whilst skating, so we had to opt for taking Myspace-style photos off the ice.

They turned out like this.

Which looks frighteningly like this:

Out of focus? Check. Blurry? Check. Nighttime? Check. Glowing building behind us? Checkity check check.

Also, you'll be pleased to know that in two years of marriage I have been wearing the same ear muffs that I bought on our "honeymoon" in Brighton:

Then...

Now...

Nice? I'm glad that I care enough to update my wardrobe and accessories enough to try and keep things *exciting*.

Instead of going out to dinner, we decided to have a cozy night in.

Iain made Toad in the Hole....

The stellar camera on Iain's Blackberry Bold makes this look like a giant ham, but it's not. And it was freaking amazing, as well.

I baked a Lemon Drizzle Cake....

And then we sat around stuffing our faces, watching Batman Begins (all the while going, "Why the hell didn't we ask for Dark Knight for Christmas!?") and sucking down Asti Martini.

...Which I now call Astin Martin, totally on accident. I think I definitely watch too much Top Gear.

I really did mean to give you an update on what I think about marriage...but I'm too tired and grumpy for that. I believe tomorrow we're getting up early to go to the gym, so I best wrap this up.

I may not be dieting all that hard, but we are working out. And technically, an hour's worth of brisk ice skating is difficult on the ass, and therefore exercise.

Anyway....

It doesn't feel like we've been married for 2 years. It still feels like a strange mixture of everything we've been through and done feeling like it was yesterday...and yet a thousand years ago at the same time.

And we're happy. And we still like each other. Sometimes we even hold hands and go to second base.

I'm not sure what else a girl could ask for.

 

Today is a rather special day, as it is me and Iain's first wedding anniversary.

Last year, at 11:00 on the 11th of January 2007, we got hitched and I can proudly say that we can still mildly tolerate each other to this day.

I really can't believe it's been a year. Not because I feel like, "THANK GOD WE MADE IT!" but because this whole marriage thing really doesn't seem to be that hard. You always hear on TV shows and movies that "The first year of marriage is the hardest." and that "Marriage is such hard work!" and I have to disagree.

Relationships, and not necessarily marriage, are hard, simply because compromise is hard. Living with someone else is hard, because you have two egos, two sets of hopes, and two sets of opinions under one roof. Two tempers, two sets of insecurities and hangups and one person who's body freaks out once a month and goes all hormonal and crampy and SHEDEVILISH.

Marriage is simply a incredibly committed relationship where both people are truly, honestly, and 100% in it for the long haul. Where the mentality isn't, "Well, if we break up," or "Well, if we get divorced..." Or at least our marriage is.

I've found that the fiercer you love someone, the more tragic (though less frequent) your arguments seem. Iain and I don't really fight, but when we do, it's not fun.

I can't speak for Iain, but I know that I've had to learn a lot this year. I've learned that when I'm depressed, or angry, or stressed, I no longer have the luxury of just shutting everyone and everything out, climbing under the covers and crying my way through the days. It's not fair, and you cannot shut your partner out.

Of course there are moments where we both know that I need to fall apart for a minute, so I hide under the covers and cry my eyes out  - but I always blow my nose, pull back the covers and then look Iain straight in the face and try my best to tell him how I feel. How I really feel.

I'm not perfect at this, but I'm trying.

I've learned that I have to come out of myself, and pull myself out of whatever mood I'm in to be there for my partner. I don't know about you, but it's very easy for me to just ball up with whatever I'm feeling and just stay there. It's very easy for me to just stay in my own little box and only come out when I want to.

But your partner needs you. There are times that even though I'm feeling miserable, I need to be able to pull out of my shell, pull my WOE IS ME cotton out of my ears and LISTEN to what Iain needs and BE THERE FOR HIM.

In marriage, you cannot be selfish. You cannot be self obsessed and needy. It's a give and take situation, just like any relationship. And if you love hard enough, and you love honestly, every stupid argument, every Kraft Singles plastic wrapper that gets left out on the counter and every used tea cup hiding under the bed is so, so worth it.

Happy Anniversary, Iain.

I love you.